There is a winding passage that leads up to my heart
And what comes down this passage is commonly called a fart
A fart is very useful, it sets the mind at ease
It warms the bed on Winter nights and disinfects the fleas!

A fart it is quite wonderful its made inside your belly
It passes through you bottom and its often very smelly
Everybody does them from vicars down to Queens
And you can do some corking chuffs if you`ve been eating beans

So hurrah for your methane, 3 cheers for your trumps
But if you strain a tad too hard, please check your pants for lumps!