Julian's Campfire Song Pages

Even More Songs

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Even More Songs
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Campfire Sketches

More songs accompanied by Trumpton Fire Brigade.

firepit.gif

This is the page into which I'm going to add any new songs that I like as and when I find them. I hope to update it fairly regularly so call back now and again for a look.
 
If you leave a good song in the guestbook (which would be nice), I'll add it to the page and highlight your name in lights as the 'donor'.

Boom Chicka Boom

 

Audience repeats after the leader

 

 I said boom!

I said boom chicka-boom!

I said booma-chicka-rocka-chicka-rocka-chicka-boom!

Uh huh! Oh yeah! One more time... ???? style

 

Other Verses:

Underwater: sing with fingers dribbling against your lips

Loud: as loud as you can!

Slowly: as slow and drawn out as possible

Opera: sing in an opera voice

Tongue in Cheek

 

Janitor style: I said a Broom-Pusha-Broom,

I said a Broom-pusha-mopa-pusha-mopa-pusha-broom

 

Barn-yard Style: I said a moo chicka moo

I said a moo chicka bocka chicka bocka chicka moo...

 

 Flower Style: I said a bloom.

I said a bloom chica blossom chica blossom chica bloom...

 

 Race Car Style:I said a vroom.

I said a vroom shifta grind-a shifta grind-a shifta vroom...

 

 

Oh Ye cannae push yer Granny off a bus

Click here for the tune: She'll be Coming Round the Mountain

 Oh ye cannae push yer Granny off a bus,
Oh ye cannae push yer granny off a bus,
Oh ye cannae push yer Granny
'Cos she's yer Mammy's Mammy,
Oh ye cannae push yer Granny off a bus!

 

Oh my Granny wears a awf'y scratchy vest (scratch scratch)
Oh my Granny wears a awf'y scratchy vest (scratch scratch)
Oh my Granny wears a scratchy,
Granny wears a scratchy,
Granny wears an awf'y scratchy vest (scratch, scratch)

 

Other Verses

 

  • Oh my Granny’s got an awful runny nose (sniff, sniff, etc)
  • Oh we'll all go round to Granny's for our tea (Hello Granny, etc )
  • Oh my Granny eats her porridge wi' a fork (slurp, slurp etc )
  • Oh my Granny’s always giving me a kiss (kiss, kiss)
  • Ye can shove yer other Granny off a bus, 'Cos she's yer Daddy's mammy 

 

Peter Rabbit's got a fly upon his nose 

Click here for the Tune: John Brown's Body

 

Peter Rabbit's got a fly upon his nose 

Peter Rabbit's got a fly upon his nose 

Peter Rabbit's got a fly upon his nose 

So he flipped it and he flopped it and the fly flew away

 

Chorus

 

Floppy ears and curly whiskers

Floppy ears and curly whiskers

Floppy ears and curly whiskers

So he flipped it and he flopped it and the fly flew away

Make up some appropriate actions to go with it

 

I Love The Flowers

Click here for the tune

 

I love the flowers, I love the daffodils.

I love the mountains, I love the rolling hills.

I love the fireside, when all the lights are low.

Boom-de-ah-da, boom-de-ah-da, boom-de-ah-da, boom

 

 

Get Your Bits off the Table

Click here for the tune: She'll be Coming Round the Mountain

 

Get your elbows of the table - (name of person)

Get your elbows of the table - (name of person)

We have seen you do it twice

And it isn't very nice

Get your elbows off the table (Name)

Various other body parts follow...

 

 

Granny’s in the Cellar

Click here for the tune: Y'all Come

 

Granny's in the cellar, Lordy can't ya smell her,

Makin' biscuits on her wood burnin' stove,

In her eye there's some matter,

that keeps drippin' in the batter.

And she's singing as the snot (sniff) runs down her nose.

 

(chorus)

 

Down her nose, down her nose

She is singing as the snot (sniff) runs down her nose.

In her eye there's some matter,

that keeps drippin' in the batter.

And she's singing as the snot (sniff) runs down her nose.

 

...Makin' jelly on her wood burning stove,

There are boils on her belly,

they keep oosin' in the jelly, .

(chorus)

 

...Cookin' peaches on her wood burning stove,

On her lips there are leaches,

they keep fallen' in the peaches

(chorus)

 

...Cookin' peas on her wood burning stove,

There are scabs on her knees,

they keep bleedin' in the peas

(chorus)

 

...Cookin' rice on her wood burning stove,

In her hair there is lice,

they keep fallin' in the rice

(chorus)

 

 

 

Granny's in the Cellar (2)

 

Click here for the tune: Y'all Come

 

Granny's in the cellar

Lordy, can't you smell her

Cooking biscuits on her old fashioned stove

In her eye there is some matter

That keeps dripping in the batter

And she whistles as the [sniff] runs down her nose

 

   Down her nose, down her nose

   She whistles as the [sniff] runs    down her nose

   In her eye there is some matter

   That keeps dripping in the batter

   And she whistles as the [sniff] runs down her nose

 

Granpa's in the basement

And to his amazement

There is something in the wine he made last fall

And his eyes are getting redder

As his tongue is getting wetter

'Cause it's ninety-seven percent alcohol

 

   Alcohol, alcohol

   It's ninety-seven percent alcohol

   His eyes are getting redder

   As his tongue is getting wetter

   'Cause it's nInety-seven percent alcohol.

 

Granny's in the laundry

And she's in a quandary

'Cause she put some starch in with her underwear

And it's gonna be disaster

When it dries as hard as plaster

But she's tough as nails and so she doesn't care

 

   Underwear, underwear

   She put some starch in with her underwear

   And It's gonna be disaster when it dries as hard as plaster

   But she's tough as nails so she don't care.

 

 

 

 

Eat a Small Squirrel

Tune: "It's a Small World"

Chorus:

Eat a small squirrel at the hall

Eat a small squirrel at the hall

Eat a small squirrel at the hall

Eat a squirrel in the dining hall

 

Verse

 

It's a squirrel with ketchup, it's a squirrel with bread

It's a squirrel with mustard lets hope it's dead

It's a squirrel that's fried, it's a squirrel that's boiled

Eat a squirrel in the dining hall

 

 

Sam, Sam, the Lavatory Man

Tune: Tom Tom the Piper's Son (roughly)

 

The actions are a must when singing this song.

 

Sam, Sam, the lavatory man,

 

Chief inspector of the out house clan

(stand straight like soldier & salute)

 

He issues the tissues, the paper, and the towels

(pass out 'items')

 

He listens to the sounds of the rumbling bowels

(hold hand to ear)

 

Down, down, down below the ground

(point down on down)

 

Where all the little poopies are swimming around

(swimming motion)

 

There sits Sam, the lavatory man,

Scooping up the poopies,

Scooping up the poopies,

Scooping up the poopies in his little tin can!

(scoop 3x times and proudly hold up 'tin can')

 

 

Tails

 

This is more of a Guide song taught to me by a Venture

Scout (as she was then some 14 years ago) who

was had previously been in the Guides. Anyway, I like it.

 

 

If everybody had a tail, and chose its shape and size,

Would you prefer a tufted one to swat at passing flies,

Or would you have  a stumpy one to thump on wooden floors

or perhaps a warm and fluffy one to curl around your paws?

 

 Chorus

 

Tails, tails, tails, you can swing them to and fro,

You can wrap them round your middle, you can trail them in the snow,

You can wave them when you're angry, you can wag them when you're glad,

You can chase them round and round and round and round, until you drive the neighbours mad.

 

 Chorus

 

And would you like it stripy, speckled, plain or maybe spotted?

And would you wear it curly, straight or elegantly knotted,

And if it were prehensile, what enormous fun to be,

The envy of your neighbours as you swing from tree to tree.

 

 Chorus

 

 

If tails were made detachable how useful it would be,

to wear your  tail for parties or for going to the sea,

Or if you're going out at night with safety first in mind,

To wear a red fluorescent one to light you up behind.

 

 Chorus

 

 

The Goat Dance or

The Patagonian Shepherds Song or

Tomorrow we’ll have Kippers for Tea

 

Tomorrow we’ll have Kippers for Tea

Kippers for Tea, Kippers for Tea

Tomorrow we’ll have Kippers for Tea

Kippers for Tea tomorrow

 

This is sung while one person dances around the Campfire circle with their trouser legs rolled Up.  The audience claps and sings along.

Once the verse is finished, the “shepherd” faces One of the audience and leaps into the air with a scream.

 

The audience member replies with a leap and scream of their own and they both dance off Around the circle one behind the other.

 

After the next verse someone else is picked and they join the line. The leap and scream greeting being passed along the line.


This  time the second shepherd dances at the front and does the picking. 

 

The lead dancer switches from the front to the back of the line throughout until there are enough people dancing to make it dangerous.

 

This can also be done without singing the words with everyone just NA NAing and clapping as they go. It doesn't really have a tune as such its just a regular clapping rhythm.

 

 

 

Our Chief Scout

Click her for the tune:  'Old King Cole'

 

 

Our chief Scout was a jolly fine Scout

And a jolly fine Scout was he

He called for his hat

And he called for hi staff

And he called for his Wolf Cubs 3

 

Now every wolf cub was a fine chap

And a jolly fine chap was he

 

Dyb dyb dyb dyb dyb said the Wolf cubs

Jolly fine chaps are we

There’s none so fine that can compare

With te boys of the old B>P>

 

Verses

 

·     Ha ha ha ha ha said the Boy Scouts

·     We do all the work said the PLs

·     No More shorts for us said the Seniors

·     Beer beer beer beer beer said the Rovers

 

It can also be done by singing the line appropriate to the verse you are on and adding all the previous lines to  it as well e.g. Beer beer

beer beer beer said the Rovers, No more shorts for us said the Seniors etc. etc.

 

 

 

Bravo, Bravissimo

A very nice way of saying thank you 

 

 

Bravo, bravo, bravo, bravissimo

Bravo, bravo, jolly well done!

Bravo, bravissimo, bravo, bravissimo

Bravo, bravissimo, jolly well done!

 

 

Bicycle Built for Two

 

Tune: Daisy Daisy

 

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do
I'm half crazy, all for the love of you.
It won't be a stylish marriage,
I can't afford a carriage,
But you'll look sweet, upon the seat,
Of a bicycle made for two.

 

Daisy Daisy the coppers are after you

If they catch you they’ll give you a month or two

They’ll tie you up with wire

And throw you in the Maria

So ring your bell and pedal like hell

On a bicycle made for two.

 

 

 

I Points to Myself

 

Performed in a German accent

 

I points to myself, vas is das here;

Das is mine top-notch-er, ya mama dear.

Top-notch-er, top-notch-er, ya mama dear.

Dat's wot I learned in der school

boom-boom!

 

As you sing this action-song, point to the proper body part when you mention it.
For example, point to the top of your head when you sing topnotcher. Continue singing and add another part of your body for each verse
and repeat the others going backwards in reverse order. Try as many verses as you want, using the list below.


For the boom-boom, clap hands, bang tables,or stamp your feet.

 

Point To                      Sing:

Top of Head              Topnotcher

Brow                           Sweat browser

Eye                             Eye Winker

Nose                           Horn Blower

Mustache                   Soup Strainer

Mouth                          Food Chomper

Chin                            Chin Chowser

Neck                           Rubber Necker

Stomach                     Bread Basket

Willy                            Wily Wangler

Bum                            Poop Shooter

Knee                           Knee Knocker

Foot                            Foot Stomper

 

 

An Old Austrian

Click here for the tune

An old Austrian went a-yodelling
On a mountain top high
When along came an avalanche
Interrupting his cry

Ooo Ooo Ooo

Chorus

 

Yodell-a kee kee ah Yodell-a-cuckoo
(whoosh whoosh)
Yodell-a kee kee ah Yodell-a-cuckoo
(whoosh whoosh)
Yodell-a kee kee ah Yodell-a-cuckoo
(whoosh whoosh)
Yodell-a kee kee ah oh

Other verses

 

.When along came a grizzly bear (grr grr)
. . . a St Bernard dog (pant pant)

. . . a Jersey Cow (Psst Psst)
. . . a maiden fair (kiss kiss)
. . . a farmers gun (bang)

 

The farmers gun ends the song on the first BANG!

 

 

 

 

A Ram Sam Sam

 

Click here for the Tune

 

A ram sam sam, a ram sam sam

Gilli gilli gilli gilli gilli ram sam sam

A ram sam sam, a ram sam sam

Gilli gilli gilli gilli gilli ram sam sam

 

A rafi a rafi

Gilli gilli gilli gilli gilli ram sam sam

A rafi a rafi

Gilli gilli gilli gilli gilli ram sam sam

 

Actions:

 

Ram sam sam

 

Slap your knees

 

Gooli gooli..

 

With your fingertips, ruffle the hair of the people on either side of you.

 

A rafi

 

wave arms in the air as though drumming

 

Repeat the song a number of times, getting faster and faster. Or alternatively, the song can be sung in a four-part round!

 

 

 

Cecil the Caterpillar

 

This item is spoken not sung usually in a silly voice. Also, the first 2 lines are accompanied by a clapping/thigh slapping Rhythm.

 

Cecil is a caterpillar. Cecil is my FRIEND!

The last time I saw Cecil, he was THIS big.

(average-sized caterpillar)

 

I said "Good morning Cecil. What have you been
doing today?" and Cecil said "I've been eating
a bit of a cabbage leaf."

 

Cecil is a caterpillar. Cecil is my FRIEND!

The last time I saw Cecil, he was THIS big.
(slightly larger caterpillar)

 

I said "Good morning Cecil. What have you been
doing today?" and Cecil said "I've eaten a WHOLE
cabbage leaf."

 

Cecil is a caterpillar. Cecil is my FRIEND!

The last time I saw Cecil, he was THIS big.
(even larger caterpillar)

 

I said "Good morning Cecil. What HAVE you been
doing today?" and Cecil said "I've eaten a WHOLE

CABBAGE!"

 

 

Cecil is a caterpillar. Cecil is my FRIEND!

The last time I saw Cecil, he was THIS big.
(a larger caterpillar still...)

 

I said "Good morning Cecil. What HAVE you been
doing today?" and Cecil said "I've eaten a whole
ROW of cabbages!"

 

Continue with Cecil eating his way through a field
of cabbages, all the cabbages on the farm, in the
county, country, world and finally universe, and
growing each time, to arms' length etc. and finally
the full width of the campfire circle, indicated by the
storyteller running "from HERE to HERE!"

 

Cecil is a caterpillar. Cecil is my FRIEND!

The last time I saw Cecil, he was THIS big.
(Indicate a normal, little caterpillar size.)

 

I said "Good morning Cecil. What HAVE you been
 doing today?" and Cecil said
 "I've been sick.......!"

 

 

 

 

The Wild Rover

 

Click here for the tune

 

I've been a wild rover for many a year

And I spent all my money on whiskey and beer,

And now I'm returning with gold in great store

And I never will play the wild rover no more.

 

Chorus

 

And it's no, nay, never, (right up your kilt)

No nay never no more,

Will I play the wild rover

No never no more.

 

I went into an ale-house I used to frequent

And I told the landlady my money was spent.

I asked her for credit, she answered me "nay

A customer like you I could have any day."

 

Chorus

 

I took from my pocket ten gold sovereigns bright

And the landlady's eyes opened wide with delight.

She said "I have whiskey and wines of the best

And the words that I spoke sure were only in jest."

 

Chorus

 

I'll go home to my parents, confess what I've done

And I'll ask them to pardon their prodigal son.

And if they forgive me as they’ve done before

I never will play the wild rover no more.

 

Chorus

 

 

 

The Hells Angel

 

Click here for the tune

 

 

Well I've been a hells angel for many a year

And I’ve spent all me money on black leather gear

But now I’m returning my bum it is sore

And never I’ll play the hells angel no more

 

Chorus

 

And it's No Nay Never (Right up your clutch)

No nay never no more

Will I play the hells angel

No never no more

 

I went into a garage I used to frequent

And told the mechanic my crankshaft was bent

I asked for a new one, he answered me nay

He said your’s is Norton we stock BSA

 

 

Chorus

 

I took from my pocket, a brand new flick knife

And his eyes opened wide, in fear for his life

He shouted I'M SORRY, TAKE WHAT YOU LIKE

I said ta very much mate I'll have a new bike

 

Chorus

 

Well as I was picking my brand new machine

Some 40 odd skinheads appeared on the scene

They said “Oi, you want bovver?”, I could not say nay

As 20 steel toecaps were heading my way

 

Chorus

 

Now as I recover in the intensive care ward

I practice my alphabet to stop getting bored

Cos after the kicking my head it is sore

And never I’ll play the Hells Angel no more

 

 

 

Yellow Bird

Click here for the tune

 

Yellow Bird with a yellow bill

Sitting on my window sill

Coaxed him closer with a piece of bread

Then I squashed his fuzzy head

 

Other verses

 

....piece of cheese ....And then I whacked....it on the knees....

....plate of spaghetti....then I cut off its wings....with my machete....

....bottle of Tizer....and then I put it....in the liquidiser....

....Spice Girls poster....and then I put it....in the pop-up toaster....

....chicken Chow Mein....put a straw up its nose....and sucked out its brain....

 

You can also try

 

A little kitten, a little cat,

Was sitting on my welcome mat.

I lured him in he began to purr,

And then I ripped out all his fur,

 

...at which point we draw a halt to the proceedings

 

Found a Peanut

Found a Peanut

 

Found a peanut, found a peanut,
found a peanut just now.

Just now I found a peanut,
found a peanut just now.

 

Continue in similar manner with:

 

  • It was rotten 
  • Ate it anyway
  • Got a stomach ache
  • Called the doctor
  • Had surgery
  • Died anyway
  • Went to Heaven
  • Didn’t want me
  • Went to hell
  • Didn’t want me
  • Came to Life Again
  • Found a peanut

There seems to be loads of different versions of this song so I've just picked out the most common verses.

 

 

Nosepicker

Tune: The Yellow Rose of Texas 

 

I pick my nose in Dallas

I pick it in New York

I pick it with my finger

And I pick it with my fork

 

 CHORUS:

 

‘Cause I am a nosepicker

morning noon and Night

I pick it on the left side

and move on to the right

 

 

My mummy says I’m naughty

She sends me off to bed

So when she comes to get me

I flick bogies at her head

 

CHORUS

 

Sometimes they’re green and runny

Sometimes they’re black and hard

And when I get real hungry

I eat them by the yard

 

CHORUS

 

I like it on lasagna

I like it with some cheese

And when I get real hungry

I just give a great big sneeze 

(Aaa-choo!)

 

The Humpty Haka
As created by Max Boyce.

It’s dead easy, basically you

do the Maori Haka using the
words of the nursery rhyme
"Humpty Dumpty".

However, change "Humpty
Dumpty" to "Humpety
Dumpety" to make it follow
the proper tune.

Make sure you employ plenty
of exaggerated arm movements
and tounge sticking out just
like the All Blacks do at the start
of an international when they do
the proper Haka.

 

The Ballad of the Woggler’s Mooly

To the tune of Clementine.

 

This is a nonsense song made famous by

by the great Kenneth Williams and he sang

it with a very West Country accent when in

the role of perhaps his greatest comic 

character creation - Rambling Sid Rumpo

the folk singer. 

 

 

For your information and as described by

Rambling Sid himself "A mooly is a sort of
smoked cuttlefish of the whelk family,

 or a brother-in-law you might say".

 

 

Joe, he was a young cordwangler,

Munging greebles he did go,

And he loved a bogler's daughter

By the name of Chiswick Flo.

 

Vain she was and like a grusset

Though her gander parts were fine,

But she sneered at his cordwangle

As it hung upon the line.

 

So he stole a woggler's mooly

For to make a wedding ring,

But the Bow Street Runners caught him

And the judge said "He will swing."

 

Oh, they hung him by the postern,

Nailed his mooly to the fence

For to warn all young cordwanglers

That it was a grave offence.

 

(absolutely mental!)

 

 

Campfires in Heaven
Tune: Oh Lord It's hard to be humble (sort of)

 

This one was very kindly left in the site guestbook by Penny Gibbons from Cornwall. I think it's a funny one and deserves to be on the main page. Thanks Penny


I remember I met an old Scouter,
He had clearly not long for this life.
He said "Man, I’m trying not the think about dying,
But it's causing me trouble and strife.
Now I know that I'll meet my late Missus
When at last up to heaven I go.
But there's one thing, you see, more important to me,
And it's this that I'm longing to know."

CHORUS


Does the Lord allow campfires in Heaven?
Can you "Ging Gang Goolie" when you’re dead?
Can you sing all those songs that you’ve loved for so long?
Or is it just choirs of angels instead?
Can you strum a guitar round that campfire,
Singing "Haylah Shaylah" when you’ve gone?
If the angels get narked when I don’t use a harp
Then I really don’t want to pass on.

Well I pondered the questions he asked me
The next night as I lay on my bed
And those small seeds of doubt kept buzzing about
Like a bumblebee inside my head
Now assuming that I go to heaven
When I curl up my tootsies and die
Will it be like we’re told with the streets paved with gold
Or a great campsite up in the sky?

CHORUS

And if the heavens above don’t show heavenly love
Or some tolerant mercy inspired
Then I’ll go when I die to the place where I’ll fry
But at least I’ll enjoy the good fires.

Now my friend has passed on to his maker
And I’m sure, now I’ve given it some thought
That the Lord, good and wise, will have one last surprise
And I believe it’s the one that I’ve sought.
When I finally meet old Saint Peter
And he opens those pearly gates wide
His bright gaze I will follow to a great campfire hollow
To see my friend with B-P by his side.

Then I will know that
The Lord allows campfires in Heaven
You can "Ging Gang Goolie" when you’re dead
You can sing all those songs that you’ve loved for so long
It ain’t just choirs of angels instead
You can strum a guitar round that campfire,
Singing "Haylah Haylah Shaylah" when you’ve gone
‘Cos the angels aren’t narked when I don’t use a harp
And that is the end of this song.